Freshers - Kitty au
by shyberius
Summary: In which Kit and Ty are university freshers, and Kit needs Ty more than he'd like to admit. Please review!
1. 1: dust

Ty had almost turned back a thousand times since he'd left Los Angeles.

But he hadn't, which was mainly down to Julian, who now turned to him with shining eyes and a set expression. He'd never wanted his emotions to show; Ty knew that Julian needed himself to be the strong one, needed to know that he was the glue that kept their family together.

Now, for the first time, Ty felt unstuck.

He held the handle of his suitcase so tightly, his knuckles turned white. They were surrounded by other Cambridge freshers, all chattering excitedly, moving constantly. Only when he looked at Julian did everything still.

"They'll tear me apart, won't they?" Ty murmured above the noise.

"Who, Ty?" Julian inclined his head to the side, all his attention on his brother.

Ty gestured pathetically. "Them, all of them. They'll hate me."

Julian's eyes softened. "Oh, Ty..." He put a hand on his shoulder, and Ty leaned into his touch. "They won't hate you. You can't go in there thinking that." Julian looked up at the college, at the crowds and the cars. He knew that, to Tiberius, the buildings were taller and the voices were louder than they were for anyone else. "You have to live here knowing that you're worthy. You're meant to be here."

No, Ty thought miserably. I'm meant to be home.

"I'll help you get your stuff to your room." Julian resolved, hauling a duffel bag over his shoulder. "Then, I have to go. My flight leaves in the afternoon."

To Ty, words were like water. Some made sounds on your tongue that boiled and bubbled like a spring. Some simply fell out of your mouth, each syllable pouring forth uncontrollably.

He had always been able to find the words in his head that could describe a situation perfectly, but now he felt dry and empty.

His room was empty. Ty dumped his suitcase onto the bed, and was transfixed by the whorls of dust which sprang up into the air. Dust. Somehow the whisper and finality of the word calmed him.

"I'll be fine." Said Julian suddenly.

"What?"

"Say it," The thin sunlight made the green in Julian's eyes dance. "I, Tiberius Blackthorn, will be fine."

Ty looked at the floorboards. "I'll be fine." He muttered, not meaning the words.

"You don't mean it," said Julian, as if he'd read his mind. "But you will. Keep speaking it over yourself, Ty, and you will."

Ty wanted to believe him. It was true, what Julian had said, that they wouldn't tear him apart.

Because, as Ty watched Julian drive away and was left with all these bags to unpack, he realised that he'd already been torn apart.

Without Livvy, without Julian, he wasn't whole. He was a threadbare version of himself.


	2. 2: spirit

It was a whirlwind. Society fairs, parading through ornate halls dressed in sweeping gowns, freshers' parties, introductions, strange people, rushing past at the speed of sound.

Ty was pretty sure he hadn't breathed since he'd left his room on the first day. He'd been holding his breath, and he didn't even notice.

This was the last party Kit Herondale was obliged to attend until he could happily bury his head in his books for the term. That was what he'd come to Cambridge for: the soft breath of pages turning, the crack of an old book spine breaking. To _learn_.

He wasn't sure who's house this was, but it was huge and ancient - all dark wooden staircases and creaking floorboards. Kit flitted through the crowds like a spirit, not wanting to be seen by anyone.

Suddenly, a stranger tapped him on the shoulder: a girl, blonde, drunk. "You're pretty," she leaned into him. Her breath smelled of cider, and Kit could feel it curling under his nose. "Can I kiss you?"

"Sure?" _Why not?_ Here was a welcome distraction from being nervous all the time.

Before Kit could say anything else, she had his wrist in an iron grip and was dragging him into an empty cupboard, where she proceeded to shove him against the door and kiss him furiously.

Everything was dark, and the music seemed muffled. Kit flailed him arms despairingly, trying to _get away_. He didn't care how: his only goal was to leave as quickly as was humanly possible.

The girl was oblivious to his escape attempts. If Kit were being honest, she was an okay kisser, but the fact that she was drunk and female took away the pleasure a bit. Then he felt a sharp elbow jab into his side, which didn't belong to the girl.

It was at this moment that Kit realised they were not, in fact, the only people in this cupboard.

The third person flung open the door to outside, throwing them into the light. His grey eyes were wide with panic.

Ty's peace was shattered. He thought he'd found a perfect refuge from the party - a warm, dark cupboard, where he'd sat and listened to music loud enough to drown out everything else.

Nobody had ever told him that a cupboard was the sort of place to make out - it was dark, for one. Surely if you kissed someone, you loved them. So surely, if you loved someone, wouldn't you want to see them?

Ty was learning that kissing people didn't mean you loved them. Which he found sad. Because, then, when you do love someone, how are they supposed to know, if you just go around kissing people all the time?

Anyway. It was confusing.

A boy and a girl tumbled into the cupboard, not noticing his presence. The girl seemed to be kissing him with a lot of energy, but Ty observed that the boy wasn't enjoying it as much. He was all tensed up, the muscles in his arms coiled like springs.

Eventually the boy broke away, which was when Ty collected his thoughts and decided that the best option was to get out. Which he did.

He didn't know why, but he threw a last glance back at the boy.

The boy looked back at him with blazing blue eyes.

 _A/N: This chapter's dedicated to @whatifweareallfictional. Thanks for the lovely comment!_


	3. 3: psithurism

All freshers resented the day that the parties ended and the real work began. Kit Herondale and Ty Blackthorn, however, relished it. This was what they'd come for.

At least, that was what Kit had come for. Ty, on the other hand, had come in part to prove something - to Julian, and to himself. He could make friends, and he could have all these experiences that he wouldn't share with his family, which would make him an entirely different person. Though Ty would rather die than distance himself from his family, he knew that he would not always be able to rely on them. He had to prove that he wasn't just a brother.

Did that make sense? Probably not. A lot of things made sense to Ty, but not to others, such as why people kissed when they didn't love each other, and why there was a word for the sound of wind through trees, which was _psithurism_. Ty thought it was an okay word, but it only made the B-list of words. Only words like plethora and myriad made the A-list of words.

At this moment, Ty was walking towards the University Library to pick up his assigned reading list. He gazed up at the avenue of beech trees as he walked, observing the silver leaves dangling there like pendants, until he had to jump out of the way of an angry cyclist. "Watch yourself!" Yelled the said angry cyclist over his shoulder.

At this moment, Kit jostled his way off the bus, pretty sure the looming brick building up ahead was the University Library. He wondered how much knowledge it contained.

At this moment, they would meet again. They just didn't know it yet, and wouldn't know it until Ty was walking between shelves, running the tips of his fingers along the spines of books. He stopped, lingering on a particularly dusty volume, his touch feather-light. He stared absent-mindedly past the book and onto the other side of the shelf, where he was met by a pair of high voltage blue eyes.

Kit jumped back, his heart leaping up into his neck. That sounded weird to other people, but it was a fitting description for how he felt, because, if his heart was in his neck, he couldn't breath. That was just how it was for Kit when he was surprised like this. He took a large step back from the bookshelf. " _You_."

"We were in a cupboard together," recalled Ty cheerfully, seeming unfazed by their chance encounter.

"By _accident_ ," corrected Kit in horror. Luckily, no one seemed to have overheard them.

A lengthy silence followed, one in which the two boys regarded each other through the books - Ty with interest, as if Kit were a museum exhibit, and Kit with embarrassment. When they spoke next, they spoke at once:

"History-" said Kit.

"Chemistry." Said Ty.

"Why are you in the history section, then?" Kit asked, tilting his head in question.

Ty could not find a rational answer for this quite yet.


	4. 4: serendipity

Ty kept seeing him. Sat on the wall outside Trinity College in the sun, the trees casting swaying shadows on his face. Leaning up against the history faculty, a book dangling from his hand. Climbing the steps to the Fitzwilliam Museum, dwarfed by it's imposing classical façade.

Every time he saw him, he was always eating a Go!bar. Ty had found this strange, so, one day, he brought one himself. Just to find out what they tasted like. As he sat at his desk, munching on his Go!bar and gazing out of the window at the torrential, un-California-like rain, Ty thought two things.

One. He missed Los Angeles - he missed it's weather, he missed Jules's pancakes, he missed Livvy's everything.

Two. If one's diet consisted solely of Go!bars, then they surely couldn't be healthy. He hoped that the boy he kept seeing was eating something other than those.

In case you were wondering, Go!bars tasted of raisins squashed between two pieces of cardboard. Ty was not going to eat one again.

 _Later_

For someone who had so many thoughts, Ty had never contemplated being this nervous. The boy sat on the wall overlooking the twisting spires of King's College, eating a Go!bar, just like the last hundred times he'd seen him. Ty stood still in the street, watching the throngs of students and tourists weave past him, fiddling with the zip of his hoodie. _Serendipity_. It meant a chance encounter between two people, one which turned out for good. The word was a delightful mixture of sibilance and plosives, rises and falls.

Ty hoped that this would be good.

Taking a deep, impossible breath, he strode over to the wall and sat down next to the boy. Two feet and two inches away from the boy, to be precise. " _You_ ," said the boy, without looking up from his lap. This was the exact same tone he'd used in the University Library - in the future, Ty would discover that this was a tone he'd use for him, and nobody else.

That was the sort of two people they would become. Just not yet.

They introduced each other simultaneously and by accident: "Ty." "Kit."

"You've been eating a lot of those cereal bars," Ty ventured.

"Who's counting?" Replied Kit, brushing his feathery blond hair to the side. "I'm not." He then leaned back, taking a proper look at Ty. "How would you know?"

Ty did what _he_ called changing the subject, but what _Julian_ called ignoring the question. "They're not too good for you. You know, if you're eating... nothing else."

Kit finished his Go!bar, stuffing the wrapper into his pocket defensively. "I might be eating other things."

Kit knew that Ty knew that he was lying. He'd been buried in his books since the moment he arrived here, and cooking, budgeting, shopping... that wasn't part of the agenda. Kit was doing what _he_ called adult life, but what _everyone else_ called barely getting by.

"You... need all of the food groups." Ty wrung his hands together. "Protein, carbs, vegetables-"

"I get it!" Kit exploded, his expression stormy. "I'm not doing anything right. And here you are, coming out of nowhere to lecture me on food groups. Did you ever consider that I - oh, I don't know - _don't care?_ "

Funny - Ty had thought he was being helpful. He guessed he hadn't read his face right. He watched the people flooding by, thinking of what to say next, but Kit beat him to it. "I can do this," he said angrily, gesturing vaguely. By _this_ , Ty knew that he meant life in general.

"It's okay." Said Ty softly. "I can too. I just haven't quite got the hang of it yet, either."


	5. 5: halo

Kit couldn't believe he'd agreed to this. Somehow, as a result of another chance encounter, he'd agreed to go grocery shopping with Ty.

 _Grocery shopping_. With _Ty._

What had he been _thinking?_

It was near closing time - outside, the sky was a deep blue, the colour of crushed velvet, of rich satin. Inside, the overhead strobe lights flickered occasionally. Ty had walked ahead, and Kit noticed that the lights gave his hair a blue sheen, giving him a small halo. Ty almost looked like an avenging angel, with his tall, angular features and ring of artificial light.

Kit mentally checked himself. All this time away from home was making him sentimental.

Ty turned, his grey eyes stark in the dim aisle. Kit was suddenly reminded of the night they unofficially met, in that stupid cupboard.

"What?" Ty had said something, but Kit hadn't been paying attention.

"We forgot the fruit." Ty repeated calmly.

"Right." Kit hid his smirk.

"Why are you smiling?" Asked Ty, with no trace of suspicion in his voice. It was just an honest question.

"I-" despite such a simple question, Kit had to think about his answer carefully. He wasn't used to things - _people -_ being simple. "I've just never met someone so organised. Seriously."

Ty nodded, as if Kit's answer were an intriguing one, and he was mulling it over. He picked up an apple, and the crimson set off the pallor of his skin.

Kit would look back on this evening and wonder whether or not he had been possessed. Perhaps he had been, and he was glad of it, because whatever had possessed him clearly saw something in Ty that Kit had barely scratched the surface of yet.

He reached out to touch the inside of Ty's wrist - his pale, delicate wrist, criss-crossed with purple and blue veins. He skimmed the fragile skin like it was water, and there was so much underneath that he didn't know.

Ty let him. Kit had no idea what this meant - he had no idea that, right now, Ty's mind was exploding with feelings and sensations and words. Kit thought that Ty would let anyone touch him, but he wasn't just _anyone_.

Kit traced his finger up and onto Ty's hand, carefully taking it up in his. Both their hands were soft, and Ty closed his eyes, his dark eyelashes sweeping down across his white cheeks.

The click-clacking of heels reverberated against the linoleum floor, startling them out of their quiet.

"Excuse me," said a supermarket employee angrily, "but it's past closing time. Are you going to pay or not?"

Ty glanced at Kit. Kit shrugged, and carried his basket to the checkout, his mind swirling with wayward thoughts.


	6. 6: bridge of sighs

Six - Bridge of Sighs

What usually happened after grocery shopping? Kit hadn't done this before; a usual evening in his household consisted of Chinese takeaway and reality TV. Not grocery shopping with a boy he barely knew.

The streets were damp and silent - it had been raining while they'd been inside, and now the pavement glistened, reflecting the orange of the streetlights. Occasionally another student would cycle past, their black formal gown billowing behind them. At this point, Kit would usually say a witty remark - something about those gowns making them look like extras in a Harry Potter film - but being around Ty somehow made it feel unnecessary. Ty wasn't one for small talk, and Kit found this refreshing.

"Which college do you live in?" Asked Ty.

"Selwyn."

"I live in King's."

Kit was always happy to provide a history fact. "King's was founded my Henry VI. He was the worst King in history."

"Really?" Said Ty, interested. They found themselves walking down the street, away from the dim lights of the supermarket. This was the part where they were supposed to leave in opposite directions, but for some reason that didn't happen.

"Yeah. There was this battle - the first Battle of St Albans - and he just sat under a tree, singing."

A corner of Ty's mouth lifted. "The college is much better than his battle tactics, then."

"I should hope so."

They continued walking, listening to each other's footfalls. Kit broke the silence with the truest thing he'd said since he'd arrived here: "I miss my dad."

It should have made him seem younger, weaker, but it didn't. There was no shame in it, and Ty knew it. "There's no shame in that. I miss my sister."

"You have a sibling?" Kit had rashly assumed that Ty was an only child. Why else would he always be alone like him - alone at the library, alone in the lecture hall, alone in the city?

Ty smiled, as if he were sharing a memory with himself that Kit could never know. "Four."

Kit's eyebrows shot up. "That sounds so tiring. How do you remember all their names?"

"It's more tiring for Julian," said Ty, "he's the eldest. He looks after us all," he stated, as if all families' older brother looked after them.

In his peripheral vision, Kit noticed that Ty's free hand - the hand that wasn't holding a shopping bag - had moving at his side, fluttering like a restless heartbeat. Maybe they should change the subject. Maybe Ty was feeling uncomfortable. "I've only ever lived with my dad, so it's pretty quiet. He didn't want me to leave for here."

"I could understand why." Ty bowed his head. "You're good company."

Kit laughed. "Thanks, but all I do is read."

"I like that." Now Ty's hands rested at his sides, pulling down at his sleeves. They'd reached a bridge - some memory told Kit that is was called the _bridge of sighs_ \- overlooking the dark, silent river.

Kit leaned on the side, placing his shopping bag down beside him to take in the murky view. "So, I heard there's some kind of festival on next week."

Ty didn't answer. He'd closed his eyes and was contentedly soaking up the spray from the river.

"It's supposed to be fun. It's where all the old building are lit up in different colours." Kit shifted from foot to foot. "Maybe we could go."

Ty looked up, his eyebrows raised in interest. "I'd like that." He said simply.

Now they were walking again, away from the bridge and past the imposing façade of Queen's College. When had they started walking? Time was all weird when Kit was with Ty. Ty seemed to screw up the basic workings of the universe.

"Livvy's my twin sister," said Ty. "She was going to come here with me. We'd planned it for years."

"Why didn't she?"

"She decided it wasn't for her." Ty's expression was unreadable. "I understood. But it still hurt."

"Hey. It's okay," Kit tried for a grin. Something to lighten him up. "You've got the freedom."

"I guess." Ty's hands were moving again under his sleeves. "I just didn't want to be alone."

Kit stopped in the street. Ty stopped too. Suddenly Kit's eyes were the same fierce blue as they had been when they'd first met. "You're not alone."


End file.
